Vouching for the Underdog..

...it comes naturally to me. The underdog need not necessarily represent principles I stand for in life...If I see, someone being hammered down by a vociferous group, I would somehow manage to identify an argument in his/her favour although I might be in total disagreement with the idea...I always knew I was like this ever since childhood, when I would support a classmate being scolded by the teacher and derided by the rest of the class or when I would support a teacher whom the rest of the class hates...I have managed to carry forward that trait all through to my adulthood ...But I never realised how strongly I support the underdog until recently when I started blog-hopping regularly...I often have this tremendous urge to leave a comment opposing whatever idea is being talked about..especially if the comments section is full of "yea i agree with you"...And b'cos I don't want to be teared apart for being the lone voice I usually return without commenting...unless its the blog of a friend...

I wonder where this "I should support the underdog" spirit come from..Maybe,its just a sense of fairness...of wanting the other voice to be heard...Or maybe its just that I'm a rebel without a cause...as my boss calls me...

PS: This post was inspired by this blog , where the blogger travels down memory lane with hatred against her mom and sisters who ill-treated her in childhood. Most of the comments there symapthise with her....Somehow, although I know if she has to carry the hatred for so long it must have been deep, I still feel like saying maybe her mom and sisters weren't as bad as projected...Maybe, just maybe, it is a matter of skewed perception...I wish so, for the sake of that 70 year old mom....

Comments

rocksea said…
The author of that blog haven't explicitly stated that she carries all the hatred now. Of course any person would have the emotions filled in one day pouring out some other day. She is pouring out the hateful bad days of the yore which she couldnt do then. Then she was the underdog, who didnt have a voice in her decisions, in what she gets, in how she lives, which college she goes. Now she has stood up, she can at least pour out her feelings! She is not playing the role back on her family or mistreating them. I feel it encouraging to see her articles every day, to go through the feelings, the psychology of a child, of a young girl. It may help youngsters and parents and families as well. No doubt in that. There is no underdog here or it could be that the underdog is able to come out and get some fresh air now.

If you look some other way, there is no bad or good people. Her mother, sisters, everyone are prone to circumstances and genetically acquired traits. Yet, here we are reading through the view of a little girl, and that is what you get.

cheers,,
techno malayali said…
Only Sarah can understand what she went through. Let's not be judgmental.
Tinkerbells said…
@rocksea: even I enjoy reading her blog..."If you look some other way.."...even I was just trying to do that...
@techno malayali: I agree that only she knows what she went through...and that's why I wasn't judgemental..I just expressed a wish that maybe they are not as bad as they are projected to be...Its jus a wish...for the sake of a happy family...no judgements....
Anonymous said…
i hate all those judgemental people who try to pretend bad things only happen to other people, and cover up their failures . tinkerbell is a perfect example of such a hypocrite.
Anonymous said…
im shocked to see this!

i just started reading sarah s blog n im sure its all true.even i had gone through something similar n i undersatnd how it feels. just coz u were always blessed wid a nice family n safe life it doesnt u to be heartless wid other ppl. n yeah... it hurts a lot dear! just put urself in dat situation n think how u would have felt at all those moments. im sure i must have given up the battle. she is not the underdog. she lives n now writes about it...that itself prooves the extend of truth n her strength.
its always easy to ignore certain questions about the life of othe ppl n criticize just to gain some attention of being somebody who can think different like u did...now try thr hard thing out...empathise...understand..pray...believe..respect n smile for sarah

cheers
maneesha
Tinkerbells said…
@maneesha: welcome to my blog!! I haven't tried to criticize or seek attention...I agree it is easy to ignore certain questions...what I tried was to actually ask some tough questions ...I believe concepts like "nice and safe family" and "truth" are all a matter of perception and not absolute...
Tinkerbells said…
This comment has been removed by the author.
Tinkerbells said…
@maneesha: and by the way, I also believe that "empathising, understanding and believing" someone does not prevent you from a)trying to empathise and understand another person and b)having a different viewpoint. Heroes and villians exist only in movies...in life there are always shades of grey...
then again as I have said at other times too...to each his/her own...so peace !
Anonymous said…
Perception ??? do u know wht it is? do u know how this term ever evolved?

its hard to percieve with life hits u hard! u cant sit back n try n percieve the blow but rather get blown n then struggle to put back thing in life.
when life is hard...it is hard! that is the truth. n trying to understand it in worldly senses is a thought forgot. none of us are born with it. we seek our path for this capabilities n we seek when life is hard. how can a person having fun of a life ever seek the essence of life? its only when we are struck we try to find out...why? why me? how 2 get out of it? n u cant really blame a person's persevernce. because percepception blooms at hard time.

so when life is hard. it is hard. n u cant justify the mood. :)

@ maneesha: good point there. thinking diff...questioning is good. but becomes great and beautiful ONLY with a tinch of basic humanitarian feeling of undersatnding, agreeing!
Tinkerbells said…
@anon: "perception blooms at hard time" - LOL !
Anita said…
Sarah's mother was behaving like a prostitute. Remember she had a job. Even though at times she didn't have money still many times her husband or ex husband was supporting her children financially. She was in love with a person who was sexually exploiting her and her children. She refused to believe her child when she was sexually exploited. How much damage had she done to her daughter is unfathomable. What ever her reasons she should realize that was not illiterate.
Tinkerbells said…
@anita: I don't agree with the first line of your comment...and I didn't understand the last line...more importantly prostitutes are also human beings, so live and let live...
Anita said…
What ever her reasons she should realize that was not illiterate. My last sentence should have read " What ever her reasons she was behaving like an illiterate.

She was hell bent that her children should not talk to any boy that they would get bad name and all the while she was disappearing "over there" every now and then. Neighbors are asking the children whether they also started their mothers job. What does that mean? Her character should have been impeccable so that she shouldn't have given a bad name to herself and her children as well.

I also had a mother who was working, but she never gave any bad name to her and us and she brought us up single handedly when my father passed away when we were pretty small.
Tinkerbells said…
@anita: my ex-boss used to always remind us that "assumptions are the mother of all F!@#$ Ups"..."over there" can be anywhere...giving "bad names" to others is a favorite pastime of people who have nothin better to do in life.
Also, I don't understand your reference to 'impeccable character'...what is impeccable to you maybe unacceptable to another...just talkin to a boy is acceptable to you, may not be acceptable to someone who is more conservative...so another person's character is essentially just a function of how open your mindset is...as long as you are not directly affected by his/her behaviour.
abraham said…
Just as Sarah has the right to write her story, you have the right to freedom of opinion. Now that we all know her story is full of holes and does not stand up to scrutiny, your post becomes all the more relevant. But I like the fair tone of this post. Wish people would appreciate that.
Tinkerbells said…
@abraham: I don't know about whether Sarah's story has holes or not...My post as you rightly said is just about being fair - or atleast about sparing a thought to all sides of a story :) ..and thnks for understanding the true spirit of the post !!!

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